Music Obsessive

'But let’s start at the beginning.  I was born in the mid 1950s into a Britain emerging from post-war austerity and awakening to the burgeoning new advances in the fields of design and technology that had been set in motion by the impetus of the Festival of Britain.  But, more significantly, I was born at the dawn of rock ’n’ roll music, arriving in this world a little after the release of Bill Haley’s ‘Rock Around the Clock’ and just before Elvis Presley’s ‘Heartbreak Hotel’, and whilst there is no way of knowing how the rise of popular music, as we know it today, may have affected other people’s lives, one thing is for sure; it affected mine.  Astrologists will claim that an individual’s fate is defined by the conjunction of planets at the moment of birth, but I prefer to believe that it was the influence of the singles chart that sealed mine.  Looking at the chart for the week ending 3 March 1956, I see that I was born under the influence of Dean Martin’s ‘Memories are Made of This’.  Well, nobody’s perfect.'

' Scene:  A vast, empty, draughty hall containing a single desk and chair.  I’m sitting at it with pen and paper at the ready.  There is a printed A4 sheet faced down on the desk.  Somewhere, a clock is ticking remorselessly.
Distant Voice:  Turn over your question paper, now.  You have one hour to complete it.
Me: Hmm.  Oh God!  Just relax and read the question.  It says; ‘Create a list of the top 5 long playing records of all time (100 marks)’.  No other questions!  It’s a doddle!  I’ll just dash this off in a couple of minutes and then look smug for the remaining time.  Here goes.
Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts’ Club Band – Beatles
Pet Sounds – Beach Boys
OK Computer – Radiohead
Blood On The Tracks – Bob Dylan
Automatic For The People – REM
That looks OK.  I suppose I could have had ‘Revolver’ for ‘Sgt Pepper’, but it’s a moot point.  Not sure whether I should have had REM in there but what else is there?  Velvet Underground?  U2?  Van Morrison?  Hendrix?  No, this will do.
My Conscience:  Very good.  I assume we own all these records, do we?
Me: Well, no, actually.
My Conscience:  So how do we know that they’re any good?
Me: Because they’re classics aren’t they?  Everyone says they’re great so they must be.  You don’t have to own a record just to know it’s good, do you?  This is a list of what I consider to be the worthiest records of all time on the basis of general critical acclaim, as required by the question.
My Conscience: I see.  So even though we don’t own half of them, we’ve listened to them all, have we?
Me: Well, no.  Not exactly.  In fact, I’ve never listened to any Dylan albums at all - can’t stand the bloke.  But I’m sure they must be OK.  He’s an icon.'